Family Friday's...My Dad

My Dad Loved....

• The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints  He had a firm testimony of its truthfulness.
• His family (and wouldn't he just love all the great grandchildren)
• John Wayne ("I haven't lost my temper in forty years, but pilgrim you caused a lot of trouble this morning, might have got somebody killed... and somebody outta belt you in the mouth. But I won't... I won't... The *hell* I won't!" 
• The Right to Bear Arms (I'm sure he has a smile on his face right now!)
• The Constitution
• America
• His conspiracy theories (and he had us second guessing people, places and events on several occasions)

Fun Memories of Dad...

• The summer of 1979 when Matt was 6 and Tiffany was 4 we came home on a surprise visit.  We hid behind the door when he came home from work.  Mom asked him "Guess who's come to visit today?" His reply, "Chris and the kids!" I have never been sure whether he was tipped off or not. He did seemed surprised though.
• An extended family camping trip during the summer of 1972. We were in a motor home travelling through Europe, where he assured us that "he could get us around all the countries we were visiting without a hitch."  First stop was a petrol/gas station in France..."Help, I am an American and I need petrol!" Those were his famous first words upon meeting someone who didn't speak English.  Peter was asked several times on that trip if he was hitchhiking with us.
• His 75th birthday.  We had planned a surprise birthday party for him and throughout the morning we made one excuse after another as to why we couldn't stop by with his presents but would see him the next day. The shocked look on his face when we and loads of people walked through David's patio door to the backyard shouting "Happy Birthday!"

Dads career's....

• "My daddy works in da sewer"
• He worked for the Salt Lake Hardware Company  (I point out that big red building to whoever is in the car when we pass by there)
• He served in the National Guard and was stationed at Fort Benning, Georgia for 6 months. That was a very eye opening experience for me as an eight year old in the South in 1960!
• He worked for the State Road Commission and we were one of the first people to drive on the I15 between Bountiful and Sandy.
• He was a personal helper to Santa Claus several Christmas's
• He worked for the LDS Church and traveled around the world and because of his assignment for three years in England he acquired an English son-in-law and a baby daughter from Wales.
• Towards the end of his life he took up writing, OK, recording his life story for his family to read.

Although it seems like forever ago...

Next week, on March 2nd, it will only be 6 years since the early morning sunlight shone through the window of my parents bedroom, and my dad slipped peacefully and quietly from this life to the eternities.

Until we met again...

Family Friday's...

Happy Birthday Granny!

Today would have been Granny's 89th birthday. Peter's mum worked all his growing up years and he was looked after by his Nan.  Granny was a very kind and generous mother-in-law and I considered her my "mum".  She was always willing to babysit and now that I am a Nana I appreciate her willingness even more.

Her name was Violet Eliza Cheeseman Unwin.  She always thought her middle name was Elizabeth because that was what her parents had told her.  Imagine her surprise when she went to work for British Telecom at an early age and had to get a copy of her birth certificate for work.  Her mum thought the Eliza on her birth certificate was short for Elizabeth.

Favorite Memories of Granny...

When being the narrator at the 1988 family Christmas party's Nativity play she said "The wise men brought the baby Jesus, Gold, "Frankinstein"and Myrrh. The play dissolved into hysterics!

Once when visiting my Grandfather Follett she expressed her delight at the large "condom" he was living in. Those of us visiting with her busted a quiet gasket!!!

She came over to visit us about every 6 months those first few years we were here. During one of those  November/December holidays, Tiffany volunteered to go to the store for me.  Just a quick trip.  Tiffany came up to me while I was standing at the kitchen sink and said "Please don't tell Granny. I just want to be quick."  As Tiffany walked to get her coat on in the other room I turned to Granny and said "Granny, Tiffany's going to the store.  Would you like to go?" I think she was ready and standing at the door before Tiffany could blink her eyes  (Tiffany really didn't mind)

The Sunday she walked into the chapel at Epsom with the missionaries.  Tiffany was aware she was having her umpteenth set of lessons and was going to be baptized, but they had kept it a secret from the rest of us! Peter even said "Mum, what are you doing here?"

When she got married it was during WWII.  Because of rationing she had no wedding cake with the exception of a cardboard cake iced with a little frosting.  So when she was here one Christmas, summer (Thanks Tiffany) she took the opportunity to go to the temple for the first time and was sealed to Ken for eternity with Peter being sealed to them.  When we came home that night we had bought a small "wedding style" cake to celebrate.  She was touched and I think very pleased.

Granny and Matt going shopping for a new headlight or taillight for our van because of an unfortunate parking episode.

Granny standing at her glass enclosed front porch holding Casey, waiting for us to arrive to get him. (I vowed then and there I would not do this with my grandchildren cause I felt so badly that he had obviously been a little stinker)

Tracking Granny down at her friend's house at 6 a.m. one morning to come babysit so I could go to the hospital and James could join our family.

Granny Loved....


Playing games, especially Scrabble.
She loved to travel.
She loved to go shopping if you were going, she wanted to come too. (see above)
She loved her grandchildren and was always knitting sweaters for them as they were growing up.

Her final months...

Peter and I had the opportunity to go over to England in June 2002.  Unfortunately she wasn't doing well health wise and we went with the sad task of finding a nursing care facility for her.  By the time we got to England she was in hospital and stayed there for about 12 weeks.  There was a lot of legal things we had to do to get her in a position to enter a care facility.  We found a nice one in a very posh area of Cheam, Surrey, England.  We were happy with it and knew they would take good care of her.  They were even willing to try and get her sprung from the hospital and into their homely atmosphere. It was hard to leave her and yet she wasn't as coherent as she had once been. We knew as we left that we were saying goodbye to her for this life.

August of that same year found all of us, Matt and his family, Tiffany and her family, (Casey was on his mission so he missed it) James, Peter and I going to Lagoon to spend a fun day together.  Granny had send money at Christmas for gifts and I had hung on to it thinking it would be great to save it for something special.  We used the money that day to go and play as a family.  The entire day and right up to Lagoon closing it's gates was spent with us saying "Oh wouldn't Granny enjoy seeing this?" "She would love to be here!" The day is one of the best family days we have ever shared!

That night as we were going to bed, (Tiffany and her family were spending the night), we continued to laugh and go over the events of the day.  We continued to talk about Granny and the fun memories we had of her. The phone rang.  It was Peter's cousin David, in England, to say that Granny had slipped peacefully away earlier in the evening.  I still remember Tiffany sitting on our bedroom floor and Peter and I sitting in bed as we received that call.  Yes, we cried. Tears flowed at a rapid rate on us all.

We were so grateful for that day!  We had spent a day being grateful for her and so it was only appropriate that we ended the day kneeling in prayer expressing our thankfulness for her in our life.

Happy Birthday Granny! We love and miss you!

Family Friday Shout Out...

Ok, this Friday's Shout Out just has to be to my favorite son-in-law, Mike. Yes, I know I only have, one but one is sufficient!

The other day I was in a meeting...and my cell phone rang.  Caller ID said it was my granddaughter, Megan.  As it was in the middle of a school day I thought I should answer it just in case there was a problem.  The conversation went something like this:

"Hello, Nana?"
"Mike, how are you?"
Mike whispering in a very hushed voice...."If I die, will you please check what your daughter has been feeding me? Oh, I gotta hang up!!"

That was the conversation.  I quickly text  Tiffany "call me."  She was obviously busy and didn't see the text for several hours.  I was somewhat concerned but at the same time knew where both of them should be.  For those of you who know, Mike has just had back surgery and I think the combination of a burnt toasted cheese sandwich and drugs had got the better of him at that moment.  It makes for a good story though....so moral to this story is Tiffany you had better not poison Mike!

Fun Memories of Mike:

When they came out of the temple after having been married I turned to Mike and said "Just remember...no give backs!" He is living up to that promise and I think he is very happy, accept maybe the poisoning scare.

Sitting on his new ladder one Christmas while opening other Christmas presents.

Riding his new bike around the kitchen one Christmas morning.

Memories of Mike I would be happy to forget:


When he "mooned" me at a pool in St. George.

When he "mooned" me at a pool in St. George. NO this is not a typo he did it two different times!!!

Why I admire Mike:


He is a hard worker and has taught his children those same values.

He eats 99.9% of the food I put in front of him. (okay the green fettuccine wasn't his favorite)


He will always come help us if we ask without a word of complaint.

He loves his family.

So Mike let me just say to you...I love you.  Thanks for being my only son-in-law, and remember....No give backs!

Why is it....

That we all want acceptance, respect and  love and yet it is so difficult to always give it and sometimes even get it in return.  Is it genetic in nature? Is it what we have learned growing up? Is it who we become all on our own?

Years ago I knew a woman who had had a hard life growing up.  She was less educated, and thought it was okay to tell people exactly what she thought and yet she was one of the most humble people I knew. However, I can't say she was my favorite person!

I  know several people who seem angry, dissatisfied whatever you want to call it at the world.   I know people who are afraid that any happiness they find, is not real.  I know several "somebodies" whose hearts are broken and sad.  I know people who prefer the "good 'ole days".  I have even laughed when they have said this because during those "good 'ole days" they still wanted something different.

There are times when I want something different.  There are times I want to be somewhere different. (a warm beach and a warm sunny day would be my first choice!)  There are times when I want to be someone different.  I  hate to admit it but there are times when I am annoyed at the world too.  However, most days I just want to be me. Happy sometimes, not so happy other times.  Why is it that we (insert I) forget to allow people these same emotions?

How about we throw anger to the wayside?  Trust in others a little more?  Extend ourselves to those hurting with a simple smile, word of encouragement, or with today's technology, text them, inbox them, email them or even pick up the phone and call them. Tell them we care. I know someone who is so very good at this that they are my hero and I love them  for their kind words of encouragement. You never fail to amaze me! (I hope you know who you are...K)

If we live with anger, fear, or unhappiness we become that all to easily.  I once decided I could remain angry with the world, slam the door, kick the cat or I could get over myself and be someone different.  I think I became that someone different.

Dare to become someone different if you need to, because....when all is said and done most of us are very fortunate!!

I hope today is a good day for you!!

February Family Flashbacks

I decided it would be fun for February to remind myself and share with others some family memories. It is the month of love and we must all have at least one fond family fun fact, or flashback. There's a lot of alliteration going on there!

My "Fond Family Flashback" this week is dedicated to Peter's Nan, Emily Annie Elizabeth Cheeseman. She was born May 5, 1888. She was a lot of fun and gave rise to several funny memories and one very sweet treasured moment.

From left to right: Granny, me, Nan Cheeseman, Auntie Lily

My bridal shower January 1972

Nan bought me an ironing board and a wooden rolling pin for our wedding. Both I still have and treasure. Every time I put up the ironing board and it squeaks it's little squeak I am reminded of her. Not because she squeaked, but because she gave me two very necessary gifts that are still in use today...39 years and counting.

 If she spilled salt she would throw a bit over her shoulder.  To this day if I spill salt I toss it over both shoulders as I'm never sure which one is correct. She said if a bird pooped on you it was good luck. Also if she ever dropped a knife on the floor she would leave it on the floor and wait until someone came home.

Nan died in February 1980.  I wrote the following a few days later.

Emily Annie Elizabeth was my husband’s grandmother, affectionately known as Nan.  She was born in 1888 and was one of sixteen children.  Her mother died when Nan was young and this left Nan to help raise her brothers and sisters.  Nan had never had an easy life but she was happy and always smiling and laughing.  Nan always had good health and had never had to go to a doctor or a hospital.  When she was a girl, she was knocked down by a horse-drawn milk cart and sustained several facial injuries, all of which her father dealt with.  Hospitals in those days were only for the dying.  Nan had often told the story and I had always admired the courage it must have taken to have withstood the pain of her teeth knocked out and her nose smashed.

Last year I took Nan to the doctor for the first time.  She had a sore toe that just wouldn’t get better.  After a while she was diagnosed as Senile Diabetic, after starting to treat that the toe started getting better.  Nan was very active.  She was always cooking and doing things around the house.  She used to make cakes for the Old Age Pensioners Club and people around her because as she would put it, “Some of them are getting too old to cook.”  Nan was 91!

Very suddenly Nan’s toe started to get worse and the doctor wanted her to go into the hospital.  We did our best to laugh and joke with her and keep her mind off the things happening to her.  She stayed in the hospital six days and then they released her.  Because she was unable to walk and needed constant supervision, Nan came to live with us.  During this time a district nurse came in every day to wash and redress Nan’s foot, and the doctor was only a phone call away.  For a few days all went well and then the infection started to spread and the pain got worse.

Saturday morning before Christmas Nan was awake most of the night with pain and had become a bit disorientated and confused.  Sometime before dawn she looked up and said, “Don’t cry Joe, don’t cry.”  Joe was her husband who had died forty years before.  At that moment I felt an emptiness I have never experienced before as I thought of what it must be like to be separated for forty years from the man you loved.  A few hours later my husband gave a blessing to his grandmother and as we felt that she was slipping away we decided it was best if we rang her daughter, my mother-in-law.  When my mother-in-law walked in Nan looked up and said goodbye.  Tears sprang to both of our eyes.  Shortly thereafter the nurse came to freshen her up and when she had left we went to sit with Nan.  I’ve never doubted but I knew then the power the Priesthood had.  Nan was sitting up in bed looking as if she hadn’t a care in the world

We had promised to bring Nan downstairs on Christmas if she felt up to it, but as Christmas morning came she again didn’t appear well.  We left her in bed for the morning not knowing what she wanted.  She seemed so sad.  Half way through Christmas dinner I went to check on her.  She was laying there with tears in her eyes.  I said in the brightest voice I could raise, “Are you ready?  Peter’s coming to carry you downstairs.”  An instant smile came to her face.  She thought we had forgotten her, we thought she didn’t feel well enough. That was the best Christmas I can remember, all of the family, four generations sharing Christmas around the tree.  We offered to carry her downstairs the next day as well, but she said no, she’d stay in bed.

Shortly after the New Year Nan went back into the hospital to have part of her leg amputated.  I broke the news to her about what they wanted to do.  She smiled and accepted it.  We felt the shock would be too much for her but within a few hours of the operation she was sitting up talking to us.  The incredible pain she had suffered was gone.  She continued to improve and we began to make plans for when she came out of the hospital.  It was decided it was best for her to come live with us, as our house could be more easily adapted for someone in a wheelchair.  Nan had a terrific sense of humor and would laughingly tell us she would chase us in her wheelchair.  The hospital even gave her one to practice with and she went up and down the hospital ward learning how to work it.

On Monday about three weeks after the operation, she didn’t appear well and had lost her usual sparkle.  On the Wednesday we learnt the infection had started again and that they wanted to operate taking the rest of her leg.  Thursday night they said she was dying and there wasn’t anything they could do.  They offered to let my mother-in-law and myself stay as long as we wanted.  We sat holding Nan’s hand and listening to the noises of a large twenty bed ward settling down for the night.  We were each lost in our own thoughts.  Mine turned from memories shared with Nan to the purpose of life, and on to prayer.  Many thoughts went through my mind as I searched for reassurance.  At about 11:30p.m. I became aware that Grandad Cheeseman, Joe as Nan called him was there waiting and I felt I could hear him saying, “Emie, Emie come home.”  It was then I knew I mustn’t grieve.

The next afternoon at the hospital Nan’s other granddaughter-in-law, Pat and myself sat talking about life in general, and about what the church meant to us.  We sat and watched Nan fighting and hanging onto life.  Shortly after 3:30p.m we decided to give her a drink and moisten her lips.  As we laid her back down on the pillows I said, “Oh Nan give in and go home.”  And she did!  It was so simple, so very beautiful.  We just looked at each other not knowing for sure.  We felt for a pulse and I went to get a nurse.  She confirmed Nan was dead and asked if we’d wait outside.  Pat and I both tried to be very brave but the beauty of it was so great that one look at each other and the tears fell.  The nurses rallied around offering us cups of tea.  I felt sorry for the nurses because I knew they felt sorry for us and were feeling an emptiness for us that we just didn’t have.  The nurse came back and gave me Nan’s wedding ring and asked if we’d like to phone my mother-in-law.  Pat and I went back for a last goodbye.  No more than five or ten minutes had lapsed since she had died, but yet her body had changed.  Her spirt had left. It was then that I knew without any shadow of doubt, God’s eternal plan and the beauty of life and death.

As Pat and I left the hospital knowing that everyone was watching our tears flow and wanting to comfort us, all we could say was, “It was so simple and so beautiful, and now she is home.”

The Big Sleepover

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This week has been the big sleepover week.  Tiffany and the kids have moved in with us for a few days while Mike is busy doing other things.  Tonight is the last night and then they will be going home and Tiffany & Mike's "fun" begins.

Nights have come early, because with 5 kids mornings come early too.  We have had a great time. Breakfast short order style, home lunches even shorter order style.  We have heard the words "hurry up and get ready. Eat your breakfast. Ellie if you don't speak up... and Megan, GET UP"

Missy and Drew have fallen in love.  Missy is wondering who is sleeping in her bed.

"Drew, Please may I have another piece of French toast.  I won't tell Nana if you don't!"

We have watched a lot of Disney channel programs, and movies.  We have even played a few games. I think we are all having fun with the exception of Mike. I must admit though....there is truly a reason why we have kids when we are young!!!!  

I LOVE BEING A NANA!!